So in less than five months’ time I turn 30. So I guess that makes me an adult. There’s no escaping it anymore. Does the big 3-0 bother me? Will I be just like so many of my friends when the panic sets in at the first major adult birthday? I’m not married, I don’t have kids, no savings and I am most certainly not where I saw myself when I was 18 and picturing 30. I’m not even where I saw myself when I was 28 and picturing 30. But does that mean I am now reaching 30 scared of not hitting any of my younger goals? No. I’m far from it. Because I am the happiest I have ever been and fully aware that life is unpredictable. And I love that. Change is good and we need to learn to embrace it.
Bearing that in mind, I have decided to embrace my new found adulthood, and set myself goals to ensure I maintain a happy face and soul. I think it’s important that we accept and receive adulthood positively, it opens up so many doors for us. We can still be irresponsible and silly whenever we like, but it is important to grow as a person and move forward as time pushes on.
I’ve had a think and even as a naïve and innocent 29 year old, I know that the advice below has helped me through the last decade, and will continue to help me through the next.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
It doesn’t make you a child if you turn to your parents or others for support as an adult. Doing everything for yourself is neither realistic or clever. It will only make things worse. Ask for help when you need it and don’t view it as a sign of weakness.
I realised not long ago that when I needed headspace I needed yoga. It was my opportunity to switch off and be present. A detox for the mind. The same can be said for meditation. Sit in a quiet space where you won’t be disturbed. Try to think only about breathing in and out. In for 8, out for 8. Try to make every breath slightly longer than the last. Whenever a thought comes into your head just wait for it to pass. Know that you can deal with it later. Try to do this for as long as you can without distractions. Twenty minutes a day meditation time will lead to a calmer and happier you, a healthy body and mind and will help you sleep. Still struggling? Try downloading a meditation app to help you.
2. Do new and fun things regularly
We are still growing up. If you are still able to get out of a chair, then you still have the opportunity to do anything you want. So that one day, when you’re sat in that chair, unable to get up so easily you will think, I can’t believe I did that. Surely that’s what life is about, new experiences and challenges?
The negative stigma attached to therapy is old fashioned and wrong. Therapy, life coaching or health coaching will ensure you have a healthy mind. I’s like the gym for your brain and it’s essential when taking care of yourself. If you’re going through a tough time, don’t be afraid to ask for help (see number 1.)
4. Plan B
Always have one. Just in case. Your plan A could be fool proof, but then again is anything ever? Having Plan B to fall back on and support you, can make difficult situations easier to recover from.
Travel, and then travel more, and then travel more. “The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page”
6. Stay organised
Have a planner, have a calendar, have a to-do list. You will find yourself more productive and accomplishing more each day. There is nothing more satisfying than crossing the big item off your to do list in time for the weekend!
7. Make decisions for yourself
You don’t need to listen to what anyone else says if you don’t want to. You are an adult and you know what is best for you. You owe no one an explanation on decisions you make for yourself.
8. Read more
My current target! As an English teacher/ Yogi/ Jewellery maker/ Blogger/ Wine lover, I can sometimes forget about the simple things in life and how happy they can make me feel. Reading makes you more intelligent and opens your mind to unlimited possibilities. So pick up a book.
9. Do what you love and get paid for it
It’s the dream and it’s a major achievement. What do you love doing the most in the world? Find a way of doing it and find a way to get rewarded for it! Perfect life, done.
10. Make time for your friends, especially the positive ones!
Real friends will always be there. I have so many friends who I can speak to once a month, but who I still consider to be some of my closest. As long as you put in an equal amount of effort to see each other, then your friends will always be there. Living in Dubai has meant I have been able to meet some of the most amazing people, but my friends from home will still make that 7-hour plane journey to be with me too, knowing I do the same in return.
11. Don’t let negative comments create a negative atmosphere
Learn to let things go. If it won’t matter next week, it won’t matter today.
Whilst this obviously isn’t the definitive, ‘how to adult’ list, I know through personal experience that just a handful of solutions from this list can help screw heads back on and keep feet on the ground. 30 isn’t to be feared, it’s a sign of progression and evolution. I see 30 as a chance to reflect on any hardships in my life and how much of a better person I have become because of them. My 20s have been incredible and I wouldn’t change a thing because they have made me who I am today. I trust all of you will take time to reflect on the last decade of your life and wherever you may be now, see how each moment has led you to becoming a stronger reflection of what you once were. If you are in a place where you don’t feel strong, take a moment for yourself and appreciate that whatever you feel has beaten you down, is only there to test your strength, so make sure you fight. Fight for a strong heart and a resilient soul and as always…
Remember your Happy Yogi Face. :)